How does gambling destroy your life?

I am writing this confession to get relief from what i have been putting myself through. The day I got to know the gambling was the worst day of life. I can’t remember how did I ended up getting into gambling. Now gambling is taking over me and I cannot get away from it. It keeps chasing ma and urge i get is intense. My gambling started after i met a brother, who happened to help with job. Fortunately , i got job through his recommendation and i was happy the way he helped me. Soon after I got job, he called and asked me about the performance of my job. We talked over the phone and found out we both lived locally . After the long conversation over the phone, i was invited to meet up with him in his location. Gradually we happened to develop the personal relationship. Long story short, one day he took me to pub for drinks since i had day off that time. I went with him and had couple of glass beers. Pub where there were full of people focusing on machine as if they were programmers and coding something. While having beer, he sat on chair and started playing machine. I was not aware about what he was doing that time as I didn’t have any clue about pokies machine and its functionality.

As time passed, we started meeting frequently and only place we would go that time was pokies. Having beer and watching him play was no more comfortable for me since we stayed there till late night. One day he gave me $10 as a gift and asked me to play somewhere so that I would pass the time instead of standing next to him and watch it. I started playing it not knowing the fact that I would come to situation where I couldn’t stop myself from going there and keep playing. Over the time , i saw him suffering and struggling with day to day activities. Having no money and relying on different friends for money to fed his addiction was just a normal day for him.one day, as normal, went to pay pokies and after spending some times , he lost everything and even used my card , didn’t have much money, withdrew until it drained up completely. He didn’t stop there and went to home to get some money requesting me to hold the machine for him. He got back with his wife card and withdrew as much as he could.

He came to situation where he was forced to take a break from relationship with his wife . I believed that his addiction could have played the role for the situation. The way he lived afterwards was really and pity and anyone would feel sad seeing him destroying himself. Now my part of story, i helped him financially a lot and accompanied him as long as i stayed nearby him. In turn i got to know how to play pokies and carried that habit with me as i moved on. I tried really hard to help him take a break from that addiction and but he would never listen to me. I always wondered why didn’t he listen to me and kept going on with his habit. Now I realised that how hard it is to break a addiction. People may question me why did you get into that habit after knowing and seeing him what he has been through due to that addiction. The answer is simple you as a smoker, do you quit smoking if someone you know die of cancer due to smoking. Not definitely, you will continue smoking because smoking became addiction for you.I didn’t know that i had a addiction until i was with him because i used to play really less amount and rest of the time i used to watch him playing. When i moved to other area. I got urged to go to pokies.

Since the place was new for me and there were no friends who i talk to in that area . The only place i find pleasure was pokies and I decided to go there on my own. I felt really happy to go there because there was always a good environment/lighting/sound for me and it was really easy to pass time. You would never know how quickly you pass time there. Going there to pass time cost me a lot of suffer, pain and loss. When i got something from machine , i never felt satisfied and kept playing. There wasn’t a single day I would come home winning money. I never cared small winnings and always chased big win. Due to that i used to come home empty hand . I would stay at pokies till late nigh sometime whole night. If i had to come home early, I wouldn’t get sleeping thinking about loss. Not only i lost money, i lost good time with family. I would always say i am at work when i got a call from family. Now neither i have money nor i have good friends.

Over the course of time , i lost everything, which I would never get back. I hate myself so much and I couldn’t control anger to myself. I had witnessed how life would be with addiction but I ignored everything i saw and went there. I would like to say sorry to the brother for bringing up some portion of your life story about the addiction. We both are in the wrong path and we both have to try hard to get away from it. I want to urge other gamblers to not introduce new to pokies. Guys do not late gambling to take control of you. Thanks for reading and please keep spreading the awareness.

Facebook Comments